My childhood was one of uncertainty,never knowing what to expect from one minute to the next. Most days began by being awakened by screaming matches at four am. School was always a welcome escape, it was my safe place. The days were awkward, I never seemed to fit in anywhere. Afternoons were always full of adults partying and getting high. I remember wondering if there was anything else to this life, if there was a way that I could make my life different. Then at the age of 12 I was allowed to join in. I thought somehow this would help me fit in.Before I knew it I felt all the pain of life start to slip away. That night began my 18 year long ride with addiction. I was a mom at 17, again at 19, and again at 25. I thought I was hiding my drug use from my children,after all, I didn't want to be like my parents. None the less, my children were neglected, as they did not receive the attention they deserved. During my 16 year marriage to their father my life was a downward spiral, out of control, sinking farther and farther into hell on earth. During those years my husband became addicted to meth. I was abused physically and mentally. My life was threatened at least once a week. I hated being lied to and manipulated. I fought back hard, but I couldn't find the strength to get out. I didn't know how, after all, I thought this was just the way life was, my whole life had been full of violence and drugs. I ended up having an affair,which I confessed to my husband. I knew he had been unfaithful as well. I tried to work things out, but our marriage was worse than ever. I honestly feared for my life on a daily basis. Easter Sunday 2002 my daughters talked me into going to church with them and my mother in law. The Holy Spirit washed over me almost instantly. I asked Jesus to forgive me for my whole life of sin, to cleanse me and come live inside me. Instantly I was free from addiction and filled with a hope I had never known before! I was changed from the inside out! That moment the restoring power of Jesus had begun in my life! I had a new start, a new life! My circumstances had not changed, but I had! One day at a time my life has been restored! I am free, from addiction, from abuse, from humiliation, from brokenness,and from guilt. Free from all the sorrow of the first 30 years of my life! I found the strength to get out of my abusive marriage. My children and I started a new life with Jesus as head of our home. Today I Iive redeemed! I have four beautiful children, a wonderful marriage to a man who seeks to follow Jesus daily. My life isn't perfect, I still make mistakes, I still fail, but Jesus is always by my side with open arms, loving me in-spite of myself. I am Redeemed!